Ode to a Firemen Calendar

Shalom one and all and welcome to this week's edition of Laura's Links, reporting to you from un-free, ridiculously poorly-run Ontario, where the mood is this and the only guys making any sense at all are this guy and this guy. Canada is well and truly screwed.

I know my column last week was a bit of a downer with Remembrance Day and all. The Great Prophet Steyn seemed to groove with the cut of my depressing jib, while his good friend the Lord Black had a more upbeat outlook which you can check out here (and if you watch till the end, you'll get the extra added bonus of seeing Mark talking about Irish boobs. Cool!).

I was trying to think of some thoroughly non-depressing stuff to relay to you, so I reached into the inner recesses of my complicated, SteynOnline In-House Jewish Mother brain but came up a little empty-handed because there's currently a lot going on Chez Cohen and it's kinda tough and heavy stuff.

So I decided to take things into my own hands! I put my very best work clothes on and searched and searched. I trawled the internet for hours on end until my hands got tired and dry and I had to take frequent breaks to stretch my fingers out! But because of my due diligence and incredible efforts, dear readers, I found a small sign of hope. It may not be much, but it is a small sign that nature is healing!

What is it, you ask? Wait for it.... After a prolonged absence due to the Murderous Chinese Communist Barbarian Bat Flu From Wuhan, firemen calendars are back!

So this one goes out to you, my lady readers and my gay readers, too! YOU'RE WELCOME!!!

Um, OH WHAT'S THAT?

Hang on, I just got an inbound message from Steyn HQ.

OMG it's from Mark!!! Sorry, is it hot in here all of the sudden? Just me?

Firemen, e-mail shme-mail... what were we talking about??

I better read this, as missives from Mark are Defcon 1 priority. Give me a second....

Hmmmmm. I see. It's a strongly worded MEMO, reminding me to be "inclusive" or they are gonna send me to Diversity Gulag down (up?) in northern New Hampshire (with the Italian driver, the German masseuse and the British cook as the joke goes, just to add insult to injury). Steyn is saying I gotta be inclusive so, I need to say "here's a firemen calendar" not just for my ladies,and my gays, but one also for The Trans! And The Non-Binaries! And The Cis Sissies also! EEK, I blew it!!!!

HAHAHA KIDDING!!! JUST KEEEEEDING. OMG how fun would Steyn Re-Education Camp be???? Ridonculously fun. Oh boy, I do crack myself up sometimes.

*waves to Mark*

*silently prays she hasn't pushed her luck too much with this bit*

*marvels at Mark Steyn's curiously unique, infinite patience with neurotic, suburban Jewish mothers*

*watches inbox cautiously*

OK but for real and not for joking, these firemen are obviously ridiculously handsome and athletic dudes but where's the chest hair? I mean, I'm totally not into carpets or anything (yuck) but the waxed thing is kind of weird and sort of gay-ish isn't it? Am I even allowed to say that?

And the ever-so-close baby-faced shave on grown men, on grown firemen? I mean that moister-than-an-oyster face thing is just, well I dunno, I guess I'm old fashioned or too cis-sy? Is it just me? Ladies? Gay guys? Non-binary peeps? What say you?

Let me know what you think in the comments so we can FINALLY have a discussion about the important things in life...

Lastly, thoughts from one group of people dumber than me (American policy-makers) and the rest smarter than me: America, this is absolutely insane (this is the dumb stuff). AMERICANS!!! Please get these demented leftist kooks to stop breaking my heart! Many smart words here (MUST READ). Here's Tim Pool sounding the alarm on the James O'Keefe story. Related: "In many ways, you are already in the authoritarian state. You just don't know it." Plus: Just Say No to the Woke Revolution. Read all about it from Bari Weiss in Commentary: "We Got Here Because of Cowardice, We Get Out With Courage". (Plus a great conversation between Weiss and Ben Shapiro here.)

See you in the comments!

~

North America:

I agree with Batya Ungar-Sargon's thesis.

Georgia parents fight back against mask mandates. Pennsylvania next?

Bridges and infrastructure are raaaaaaaaaacist. Who knew?

Where's Gavin? Oh, here. When you have decadence on this scale, and wanton destruction and foolish woke-lefty policies in the same city, things will fall apart. The centre cannot hold.

As per Jesse Kelly: "America is not a serious country."

"Nothing in this country works."

More on that here. Related: "Semper Woke".

This thug, this utter thug, has some nerve.

Rest in Peace.

Meanwhile...

And this is a great advertising strategy. Really gives me great confidence in the product.

You go girl. And look at the way Dad looks at his daughter. This is the way it's done. Good Dad, good egg!

So, how many times does this have to happen to kids before the media stops spouting "rare"? Also, you'll notice that no matter how serious the outcome (death being the primary most serious outcome), every one of these articles contain an obligatory "but go get vaccinated anyway, it's still highly recommended" phrase. Every single one. When will this stop?

Why was the US-Canada border closed for so long?

"Misunderstanding" is not the word for this.

Five Navy SEALS running to save America (hubba hubba!!).

~

Europe:

The Polish border is the new fortress Europe.

France: The jihadist murderer of Holocaust survivor Mireille Knoll sentenced to life.

Perhaps a more rigorous HR process is in order?

~

Asia:

Taiwan notices the dangers.

~

Evil, Barbarous, Murderous Communist China:

This guy has an even better election rate than Saddam Hussein!

~

Israel and Jews:

History GEEK OUT!!!

~

The Formerly Great Britain:

"I had the vaccine...under the belief, which has now been proven FALSE, that I was going to protect patients from getting the virus from me."

The last warrior of Britain's "forgotten army".

Blind, disabled and elderly people will die or get maimed, but at least the trans zebra crossing will have been built and that's what really matters, isn't it?

"Britain got scared by a mouse and ran towards a tiger."

"It's time to put Covid behind us." Endorsed. About frigging time.

You don't say.

~

Kook and Predatory, Child-Grooming, Insidiously Power-Grubby Left:

Thousands of parents pull their kids from "woke sex education" a.k.a grooming.

White people need not apply.

"Racism is still a blight on American life. But wokeness is not how we heal; it has simply redefined the problem to the benefit of educated elites."

"They" are after your children: "Walker was discussing their book, "A Long Dark Shadow: Minor-Attracted People and Their Pursuit of Dignity," when he insisted it's important to use that terminology instead of "pedophile" because it's less stigmatizing."

~

Today in Satan:

They are going after babies now. Who are the parents sacrificing their babies?

~

Human Grace:

Another good egg. Well done.

He waited so long for her! (Get Kleenex ready!)

When he met his only living relative.

The dancing Dad and his cancer-free son.

In which I agree with a Cardinal.

"Calling all men."

Twenty-one weeks.

"It's a blessing to be a blessing."

For parents, via Melissa Mackenzie, Publisher of the American Spectator, their first annual list of of non-woke books for children just in time for Christmas. More non-woke books that look great are now available at Heroes of Liberty, edited by Bethany Mandel.

It's open thread time! Log into SteynOnline and let Laura know what you think of these stories or other happenings from week that was. Commenting privileges are among the many perks of membership in The Mark Steyn Club. While going off topic is permitted on Laura's Links, do stick to the other rules as you engage: no URLs, no profanity, and no ad hominem attacks.